Maya's Birth Story

As described below in Ethan's Birth Story, we are putting the kids' birth stories online for safekeeping and for nostalgia's sake... hope you guys enjoy them...


Fashionably late – a day “late” – possibly to make sure we were paying attention, or maybe to make sure we were ready for her – Maya Trinity Margaret was born Monday, February 9th, 2004. She came out kicking and screaming. She wanted everyone to know she was here!! Our little Aquarius has already started marching to her own little drum.

What a night!?

Although, we’re not exactly sure when the labour started, it could have been during one of our few false labours, or maybe it was sometime before that – maybe when Amanda was told she was 3cm’s dilated and completely effaced (two weeks before the actual delivery date). Some were heard whispering that some of the spices in Sunday night’s stew may have “set her off”. I personally think that it was just time… although, whether it was Amanda’s or Maya’s schedule remains to be seen…

Amanda’s water broke at ten to three in the morning of the 9th. Five very eventful hours later, almost to the minute, Maya entered the world.

At about five to three, Amanda climbed back into bed and said, in a déjà-vu kinda way, “I think my water broke”. Now, it being the second time that I have heard these exact words, I figured, strangely enough, that my reaction should be the same. Non? Well it ends up, I was wrong. You see, I said, “O.K., well, how are your contractions?” The reply being a suspiciously vague “I’m not sure. They’re not very strong or regular.” So I said, “O.K., well, go back to bed and we’ll go to the hospital in the morning.” Apparently, that was the wrong answer. So, I got out of bed.

Now, we had been worried about a few things leading up to this evening. Amanda had had a hard time sleeping a few of the nights leading up to this. She was mostly worried about what we were going to do with Ethan. I told her that her aunt Shirley said that if we had to, we could bring Ethan along with a playpen – apparently it happens all the time on “that” birthing show. Again, another wrong answer. So, I called my brother Ben. I told him I would pick him up in ten minutes that he had to watch Ethan. Which he was more than kind to try to do… he didn’t mention that he was violently ill. I only found this out when I called home the next morning to find that Peter had relieved Ben of his responsibilities. Ethan and Peter got along famously – giggle fits and all. Peter did a wonderful job for us on both Monday and Tuesday, in fact.

So, we got to the hospital around 4a.m. and were promptly admitted. At this point Amanda was 5cm’s dilated and completely effaced. By 5:30 Amanda was administered Demoral. She thought that it would take the edge off her contractions… hmmm. She only found that it made her tired. She said, later, that this would have been great had the labour been like Ethan’s (25 hours). She might have been able to get some sleep.

By 6:00 am, Amanda realized that the contractions were growing in intensity. It’s probably for this reason that the narcotics didn’t seem to give any noticeable relief. By 6:30, the epidural was being administered. Now, interestingly enough, second births (like the children that they yield) can show reflections of what the parents learned the first time around… if any of you remember Ethan’s birth story (if you don’t have it and would like to read it just reply to us and ask) Amanda was dead set against drugs, but she ended up needing them due to circumstance. Funny enough, with Maya, Amanda went into this experience with a different resolve. I suppose you could say, “Minimal pain for maximal gain”. To be fair (I’m always fair aren’t I?;-), Amanda had recently pulled her groin muscle trying to catch our acrobatic, stability impaired son, Ethan falling down the stairs. This pull shot pains through her obliques every time she coughed or sneezed. She dreaded the thought of full blown contractions and the pushing phase to come, for this very reason…

For my part, I was nervous and stressed. I know, Amanda was the one doing all the work and going through all the pain. But, I was in a tizzy nonetheless. I was thinking way too much (for a change). Early on, from about 4:30am ‘til about 5am, every contraction slowed Maya’s heart rate considerably. And, on the way into the hospital I, for some reason had been focused on all the things that could go wrong. The umbilical cord stood out in my mind. So, every time I saw the little heart rate drop from 140-150 down to 95-110 during the contractions I got nervous. It didn’t help (my nerves) to see that the nurses were equally (though legitimately) concerned. It ended up being the position Amanda was in. By 5:30 the condition had cleared itself up and the concern level had decreased. (Although, during the pushing phase the concern had reemerged and there was a new found attention placed on the fetal heart monitor… they tracked this right until the very end.) My stress levels must have been pretty apparent. Dr McCarthy mentioned to Amanda the next day that he was keeping an eye on me because he thought I was going to pass out.

Speaking of Dr McCarthy, the nurses had been in touch with him all evening/morning. But, it wasn’t until 6:45 that we really understood how fast the labour was progressing. By 7:15 Amanda was 9.5+ cm’s dilated… and Dr McCarthy wasn’t due in until just after 8am… eeks. Well, he showed up at 7:30. I heard one of the nurses say, “That man just pops up right out of the ground when you need him!” - the funniest moment of the night happened just after I first saw him - I was so relieved when he entered the room (see Ethan’s B-announcement for his calming effect)… well my relief was expressed by my exclaiming “Mr just-in-time!!” – to which Amanda took her first swipe at me (it was only a mild body blow ;-)…

From there Amanda started her pushing. WOW. A whole lot of work. She also said later that the contractions weren’t helping her that much… but this feeling might have also been due to the relatively short time lapse between the epidural administration and the actual pushing phase… last time the epidural’s effect had elapsed and the oxitocin was in full force. This time, the epidural was in full effect and there was no oxitocin helping out.

And then at 7:54 am, a glimpse at the sublime and happiness and relief all around.

Maya was born.

Many of you may or may not be wondering what cemented the name for me. I mean, it took us over 12 hours to pick her first name. Well, in the spirit of being thorough, here you have the definition of Maya:
1. The power of a god or demon to transform a concept into an element of the sensible world.
2. The transitory, manifold appearance of the sensible world, which obscures the undifferentiated spiritual reality from which it originates; the illusory appearance of the sensible world.
Very powerful indeed. I suppose these could mean very different things to many different people. But, to me, the name represents a few possibilities. There is the possibility of applying or transforming knowledge (or what we know) into practice (or the “sensible world”). It could also represent living out ones beliefs. Or it could be maintaining a post modern sensibility and understanding of existence.
In the end, however, I hope it is Maya who teaches me the meaning of her name.
Good will to all, and thank you for sharing in the beauty of our day.

Attached is a slideshow of some of our most beautiful moments and joys from the 9th of February, 2004.

P.S. we lost many of our email addresses recently. Please forward this message along to all our friends and family we were unable to reach this “round”. And to those of you who are receiving this email 2nd hand and would like to be in our contacts list, please reply to us so that we may add you (anew) to our address book. Thanks.